I’ll be honest with you: I’m not exactly the biggest fan of Valentine’s Day. The cards, the candy, the overpriced roses — I’m not just over it now, I was over it decades ago. What they’ve done is taken an innocent little day on the calendar and turned it into a consumerist free-for-all. I swear, by the time you get done buying everything — and don’t forget the fancy dinner — you’re out a few hundred bucks and thinking wistfully about all the fine car parts you could have bought instead.
But if there’s one thing I can get excited about this time of year, it’s some kind of connection between Valentine’s Day and a bunch of great cars. This year, I’m going to kick off the festivities with a Top 10 list of the most lovable (get it?) cars on the road. These are the cars that I would ask to be my valentine, if I were into that sort of thing. Any time my heart goes pitter-patter, chances are it’s because one of these masterpieces just drove by.
1. Audi RS 7
Twin-turbo V8, 560 horsepower, zero to 60 in three-and-a-half seconds. Quattro all-wheel drive with a torque-vectoring rear differential. Need I say more? Oh yeah, it’s got gorgeous fastback styling, too. You will be mine, RS 7; you will be mine.
2. Chevrolet Corvette
The C7 Corvette is so seductive that it ought to be rated NC-17. It’s got curves in all the right places, and the 6.2-liter LT1 V8 purrs like no other. Don’t even get me started on the 650-horsepower Z06. Can I use the phrase “sex on wheels”? No car embodies it better.
3. Porsche Cayman GT4
Folks have been grumbling for years about how Porsche knowingly neuters the perfectly balanced Cayman in order to keep the tail-heavy 911 atop the food chain. Well, now the GT4 is here, and it’s packing a 3.8-liter, 385-horsepower flat-6 borrowed from the mighty 911 Carrera S. There’s one transmission, by the way, and it’s a six-speed manual with three proper pedals. In this case, the car is basically a Valentine’s Day present to all of us.
4. BMW i8
Another gift this year is the fact that the i8 is finally on the road. I remember when it showed up in the latest Mission: Impossible flick a few years ago, and then everyone kind of forgot about it when BMW didn’t bring it out soon thereafter. But now it’s here, and it was worth the wait. You get 0-60 in 4.5 seconds, 20 miles of electric-only driving range and some of the coolest styling this side of Lamborghini. Be still my heart.
5. Ferrari 458 Italia
What would a Valentine’s Day list be without a Ferrari, the brand that only looks right in red? The 458 Italia has a special place in my heart because it could be the last of the iconic midengine Ferraris with a high-revving, naturally aspirated V8. Seems like everyone’s turning to turbos these days, but the 458 soldiers on for now with one of the sweetest sounding motors ever built.
6. Ford Mustang GT
Speaking of naturally aspirated V8s — and cars that look great in red — the latest Mustang GT’s got the most refined V8 on this side of the Atlantic, and its new independent rear suspension makes it one of the best handlers, too. Right now the headlines are all about high-performance Mustangs that cost more than the workaday GT, but the latter is plenty good enough to make your heart swell every time you lay eyes on it.
7. Ford GT
Ah, turbocharging. Here we see it rearing its head in the all-new GT supercar, which is powered by a twin-turbo “EcoBoost” V6 rather than the supercharged V8 of yore. Okay, so it won’t sound as good. But the new GT’s styling is so fantastic that I don’t even care. Hey, don’t judge; we all lust after certain things based on looks alone.
8. Dodge Viper
The knock on the Viper has long been that its V10 engine sounds like a UPS truck, but here’s my question: Have these armchair critics actually driven the car? The driving position is cartoonish in the best possible sense, with the windshield right in front of your face and the hood stretching out for miles in front. The clutch and shifter require more manly effort than anything on the market. The handling (now with stability control!) is astonishing. The Viper is nothing if not a hot date.
9. Mercedes-AMG GT
When’s the last time a Mercedes ignited your passions? For me, the new GT is my first. Benz has always been about massive, intimidating road presence, with sporting thrills a marginal concern at best. But the GT is clearly aimed at the Porsche 911, and it’s certainly got a shape that can seduce. I don’t mind the turbos in this case, incidentally — Benz’s twin-turbo V8 is a thing of beauty. Can’t get enough.
10. Bentley Mulsanne
I can’t say that I’ve got an extra few hundred grand lying around, but if I did, my sedan of choice would be the big Bentley. What makes the Mulsanne so lovable is that it’s authentic. The platform is a rear-drive, Bentley-only item, in contrast to the Volkswagen/Audi-sourced front-wheel-drive platforms that underpin other Bentley models. The engine, too, is a genuine Bentley article — the legendary “6.75-litre” twin-turbo V8 with dump-truck torque. The interior, of course, is hand-made with the most opulent materials imaginable. Every day is Valentine’s Day if you live with one of these beauties.
What Do You Love?
Help me round out the list with some other rides that get your blood pumping.
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