With All Hollows Eve here, we felt it was only appropriate to put together a list of our favorite scariest cars. It could be a car’s looks that make us shudder. Or, if the car is seemingly possessed by the devil himself, its personality would be more than enough to stop us from getting behind the wheel…or in front of its menacing grille. In other cases, it could be a vehicle’s performance that gives us the willies, whether it be as quick as a cat or as slow as a snail.
Here then, in no special order, are our Top 10 Scariest cars. Tell us in the comments section what you think and if you’d like to add your own favorites to the list.
The Plymouth Fury from “Christine”
With the perfect “face” for a Hollywood thriller, the 1958 Plymouth Fury that starred in this Stephen King movie might’ve said “the devil made me do it” after committing its various acts of terror. That is, if the car talked. Virtually indestructible, Christine had an axe to grind, and grind it she did. Now, every time we see a ’58 Fury at a car show, we steer clear because you just never know…
Early Porsche 911 Turbo
With its powerful engine sitting essentially behind the rear wheels, giving the car a decidedly rearward-biased weight balance, the Porsche 911 Turbo was known for being very unforgiving of unskilled pilots. Although it was generally a solid all-around performer, it had an evil side. If you went into a turn too fast and jumped off the gas and/or hit the brakes, the rear end could swing around faster than you could scream “snap oversteer!” As this Porsche supercar matured, suspension revisions and the adoption of stability control and all-wheel drive tamed the Turbo’s wicked tail.
Animal House Deathmobile
As if the hard-partying frat brothers featured in this movie weren’t scary enough (at least to the school’s professors and female students), they took a pristine mid-’60s Lincoln Continental and gave it a decidedly macabre makeover. Dubbed the “Deathmobile”, the formerly formal luxury car, obeying the hands and feet of its manic driver, wreaks havoc on the homecoming parade.
1920’s Argentine Funeral Car
Hearses are usually gloomy enough for most folks. But this coffin hauler takes it to a whole ‘nother level. Specifically, this custom-bodied coach sports flourishes of carved wood overlays that, to our eyes, emphasize the creepy vibe. Seemingly for comic relief from the specter of death, the car also features what looks like a stylish pompadour over the driver’s compartment.
Bugatti Veyron Super Sport
With a mind-bending 1,200 horsepower overflowing from its quad-turbocharged 16-cylinder engine, the mighty Veyron can rip to 60 mph in just 2.4 seconds. Provided you’ve got the conditions and the considerable nerve to keep your foot in it, this Veyron will obliterate the quarter mile in less than 10 seconds. Ignore the alarms clanging in your head and your rapidly increasing pulse rate and you’ll blast up to a top speed of over 250 mph. With such stupendous performance, the Veyron has been known to put more than a few butterflies in the stomachs of driver and passenger alike.
1950s-1960s air-cooled VW Bus
Using the same 24-50 horsepower engines as the Beatle of the same era, the VW bus understandably had trouble getting out of its own way. Although legions of Dead heads didn’t let it affect their mellow vibe as they went from concert to concert, this sluggish nature made the beloved Bus downright dangerous. With it taking about 26 seconds to run down a quarter mile, the vee-dub’s acceleration (if we may misuse that term) while trying to merge into fast-moving freeway traffic would be terrifying indeed.
“The Munsters” was a TV show that was popular in the 1960s and 1970s. Baby boomers will likely recall with fondness their family car. A custom creation that took the Frankenstein approach to car building, the Munster’s coach was comprised of three Ford Model T bodies along with a seriously built Ford 289 V8 engine. With its considerable presence (it was nearly 20 feet long), the Munster’s “Koach” made a fitting addition to the family of loveable monsters.
Green Goblin from Maximum Overdrive
Not one of Stephen King’s better known efforts, this mid-’80s horror flick featured machines — including lawn mowers, chain saws and hair dryers — that came to life and killed people. One of them was a black tractor trailer that had a cartoonish green goblin head affixed to its front end. As if running down people at a truck stop diner wasn’t bad enough, the sneering mask added greatly to the big rig’s creep-out factor.
A New York Taxi
Typically a Ford Crown Victoria, a NY cab can be a scary car indeed. But it’s not necessarily the car’s fault as much as it is simple physics. You just don’t want to get in its way, as its driver is charged with the nearly impossible task of consistently getting people to meetings and airports on time, despite the teeming masses of pedestrians, cyclists, skateboarders and other cars that clog the non-sleeping city’s streets at all hours of the day.
The Beast of Turin
Built to compete in the one-mile speed event in 1911, the Fiat S76, nicknamed the Beast of Turin, boasted a simply massive 28.5-liter, 300-horsepower four-cylinder engine. That means each cylinder displaced over 7 liters. To put it into perspective, just one of this Fiat’s cylinders boasts more volume than the total cylinder volume of a new Lamborghini Aventador’s V12. The Fiat’s giant engine made for a comically tall hoodline and a frighteningly loud and discordant exhaust. Check out the video here and you’ll see, and hear, what we mean. We cannot think of a vehicle more deserving of its nickname.
Have a safe and happy Halloween, folks!